What do you call a bird on the beach? A seagull.

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Why did the bartender kick out the three jews at midnight? Because the bar closes at 11.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house red. Babies, especially dead ones cannot paint.

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Womens' rights.

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Frog-why did the chicken cross the road Chicken-dont judge me...

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What's the difference between Justin Bieber and a gay guy? They're both gay

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have ADHD, Oh look a butterfly...

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What is Helen Keller's dogs name? She had fish.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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How do you get a giraffe in a fridge? Open the Door, put the giraffe in, close the door How do you get an elephant in a fridge Open the door, take the giraffe out, put the elephant in, close the door There is an animal meeting, one animal doesn't show up. Which animal didn't come? The Elephant, it's still in the fridge You come across a crocodile infested river, how do you get across? You swim across, the crocodiles are at the meeting, Weren't you listening?

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What's funnier than a rock. A funny rock.

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What's worse than 20 babies stapled to one tree? Getting life imprisonment after...

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Gadaffi

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if two couples walk down the street, when do they die? when a pack of rabid dogs eats them.

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Did you hear about the black guy who got into college? Actually, there are nearly 10,00 African Americans who get accepted into college every year. This specific black male is notable because of his stellar grades and his activity in his community.

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Hello we are from the church of the latter day saints.

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whats the difference between a joke and the holocaust? ...There both funny..Exept for the Holocaust.

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Have you seen Helen Keller's back porch? Neither did she.

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Why did the dog bark? Who knows, dogs bark for many reasons unknown to humans.

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What did the blind man say to the librarian? Hello, I am looking for books that are published in braille.

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How did the chicken get to the other side? He didnt, he got ran over.

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Roses are red Violets are blue your mum went to the loo and out came you

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Why did the boy fall down the stairs Because I pushed him

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Roses are red. Violets are purple. Haha. Purple.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops