A woman walks into a bar. She gets hit on by every guy in the bar. After hours of being hit on she finally has enough and asks the guys to stop. The guys Say "ok im sorry". She leaves.

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a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o q r s t u v w x y z i left out p.

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Why did the monkey fall off his tricycle? He got hit by a fridge.

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What do you call a woman who has one leg that's shorter than the other? Asymmetrical.

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What did the girl say to the boy? I don't know it was a private conversation

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Why did the house burn down? Because I set it on fire.

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A dentist, a librarian, a construction worker, a gynecologist, a zookeeper, a shoemaker, a terrorist, a politician, a cyclist, a truck driver, a kangaroo, a Mexican, a blonde, a Jewish black guy, a Honda Civic, a monkey, a penguin, an FBI agent, a stock broker, a president of a foreign country, a CEO of a very wealthy company regarding AIDS, a founder of one of top downloaded apps in the market, a chief executive, a cook, a waitress, a priest, a nun, a little boy, a fairy, a dinosaur, and a skeleton walks into a bar. There's no punchline.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Penis... Okay...

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p p p penis. penis's are big and juicy

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What did the general say before the soldiers got in the tank? Get in the tank

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Penis

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Why didn't the skeleton go to th party? Because he was dead.

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What do you call a former pope. Dead!

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Knock Knock Who's there? No one was there. It was two birds flew into the door and died.

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The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?" The graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?" The graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?" The graduate with a Liberal Arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"

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What do you call a pig with 57 nipples? 3 more nipples and you can call it a 60 nippled-pig

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That's as _____ as a ______ guy. Works with anything, and people do laugh.

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why did tom drop his ice cream he didn't because he had no icecream

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What did the tourist in Africa get? A souvenior.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Yo momma's so dumb, she's not smart.

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How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb? 1

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Roses are red, Violets are pencil, this poem makes no sense, refrigerator

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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