Person One: Three bears are eating tacos, seventeen bears are making margaritas, how many bears are going to the supermarket to get overly prices expired two percent milk? Person Two: ...Who gives a shit!!!!!!!!?!?!?!?!!!? Person One: No! That is incorrect!..................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................its 16

-Knock Knock -Who's there? -To. - To Who? -To whom.

What did the man say to the horse in the bar? Nothing, communication requires listening and comprehension which horses cannot process in their brains. If anything the man said it at the horse, not to him.

Why did the car suddenly stop? It was at a redlight.

what do babies and prostitutes have in common they will both cry if you hit them with a brick

How do Chinese people get their names? From their parents.

Where is my tractor?

haha, you're an orphan

Your mama's so fat that she has type 2 diabetes.

What did the man get when he found a genie in a lamp? The rest of his life in an asylum for schizophrenia.

Women's Rights.

knock knock. Who's there? Jehovah's witness. *Door Locks*

Christopher Walken to a bar.

you want to hear a joke? sure... too bad

What's the difference between a catholic priest and acne? Acne waits until the boys hit puberty before coming on their face.

What do you call six million jews? Dead.

"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "That's kind of ambiguous..."

What's worse than missing Taco Tuesday? Your whole family dying in a car crash.

25

What do you call 200 black men jumping from a plane? Night

A black man walks up to a jewish man in a bar. They engage into a nice conversation, seeing how they were friends back in college.

Some dude and his son are driving to school. They get into a car accident so the have to go the the hospital. But when the doctor comes in, the doctor says "I can't oporate on this boy! He's my son!" Who's the doctor? His Mom.

A boy asks his teacher to go to the bathroom, she says ok but only if he can sya the alphabet. He says ok, but for some reason skips the letter P. How come? -Because he has a sever learning disability and is having a hard time remebering all the letters of the alphabet

What do you call someone with no legs? whatever their name is, physical appearance should have no bearing on someones title.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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