whats retarded and looks like a fat duck? GEorge goodburn

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I have adhd theref- hey look a dandelion

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GEORGE LOPEZ SUCKS

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A traveler gets a flat tire on an old farm road. He goes to the door of the neasrest farm and knocks. The farmer and his beautiful 21 year old daughter answer the door. Traveler: "I'm sorry, but I have a flat. Is there any place I can stay until I get it repaired?" Farmer: "Why yes. Our church sponsors a homeless shelter and rehab center down the road.I can give you a ride there if you like?"

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How do you stop a bus? Throw small children in front of it. Except it didn't work for the boy with ice cream.

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why did the nazi eat the jew? He didn't

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What did the girl with no hands get? Gloves.

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Make an effort in life whenever you want. Fight trough life when you got no other choice.

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Why did the woman walk into the men's clothing store? She's a lesbian. Why did the man walk into the womens clothing store? He had to buy his mom a birthday present.

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What's harder than nailing a baby to a tree? My penis whilst im doing it.

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Your mom is so dumb that she doesn't get this joke

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What do you call a whore? Kelsey cook duh

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Where did Martha go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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There once was an X from place B, Who satisfied predicate P, Then X did thing A, In a specified way, Resulting in circumstance C.

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what do you call a blonde who can't drive? a poor driver

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was being dragged by a truck

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What do you do when you see a plumbers crack. Tell him he has another crack to fill

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69

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You have 6 basketballs. One rolls away. How many do you have? None because your family has a low income, lives in a broken down trailer, and has 5 other kids to supply for.

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roses are red, violets are blue, my name is dave, this poem makes no sense, microwave.

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What is underneath Chuck Norris' Beard? His Chin

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What type of vision does an Asian person have? 0-0 because he is blind

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so a kangaroo a piece of cake and a whale are all doing... ...nothing they would not hang out together

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What did the salad say to the dressing? Nothing! Carrots don't talk!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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