Knock knock. Who's there? It's the police. Your father's been taken to county jail for his third DUI.

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My piggy bank is empty. No change there then

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Roses are brown I like clouds this joke isn't funny so don't laugh..... Oh an I am trying to get the most dislikes so whatever you do don't like it:(:(:(

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Why does your mother not love you anymore? Because she was in a tragic car accident 5 years ago and is now deceased and is therefore incapable of love.

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What happened to the man who dropped his soap? Nothing he picked it up and lived a happy life.

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What do you call a man with no legs and arms hanging on your wall? Art

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[] i have read and agree to the terms of service Nope

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What's worst than failing your test? AIDS

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What do you call a watermelon in Africa? A watermelon.

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Why did little Bobby put a firecracker in the dog's ass? Don't worry, he used lube.

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Wy was the lamp crying, because his mother turned into mashed potatoes.

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What job function does a blonde have in an M&M factory? Quality control or some other function.

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Yo daddy!

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How its supposed to go: Knock knock Who's there? I eat mop. I eat mopwho? How my friend Cassidy did it: Knock knock Who's there? I eat my poo! Oh wait I screwed up.

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A man is walking down the street when he stumbles upon a school, every school in the area had an American flag outside it, so he sees the flag and atop this flag a man is sitting and he doesn’t look comfortable. Next to the flag pole is a chair with a flag attached to it and the wind is as strong low down. So he looks at the man and says "Sir I think you may be using those wrong." The man on the flagpole says "why?" So he says well this chair is flat and made for sitting and this flag pole has a draw string for the flag. The man atop the flag pole says "I'm sure good will come of this…..im sure." the man says "What good could possibly come of this!" and the man on top of the flag pole looks at him and says "Later……………..you can tell this story to your friends and disappoint them when they find out theirs no punchline."

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Why was the man crying He wasnt his allergies were acting up.

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Once my grandpa said: Your generation relies too much on technology. Then I said: No. Your generation relies too much on technology. Then I unplugged his life support.?

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No it isn't.

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What did the Atheist say in church? His best friend's eulogy.

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What do you call a black guy who flies an airplane? A pilot, you racist.

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Why do showers in Germany have 11 holes? Because a regular human on has 10 fingers.

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Q;what do you call a fish with two knees and personally HANDS out JOBS A: a blowfish

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(Man #1): Do you know how I know you're gay? (Man #2): How? (Man #1) When I kiss you, you kiss me back...

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Ham sandwich

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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