whats orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot

What's the difference between 10 dead babies and a red sports car? A red sports car was never a living organism.

What's 1+1? Window! Just kidding it's 2.

Why didn't the lactose intolerant man get a drink at the bar? He was the designated driver.

A woman should not be in the kitchen.

- I did your mom last night! - Thanks, Dad.

What's the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes back from camp.

What is the difference between my elbow and my penis? I Cant lick my elbow

What's the difference between a rooster and a waffle iron? A lot.

Whats worse then failing ur English test? Getting hit by a train

What's the difference between an alcoholic and a drug dealer? An alcoholic is an extremely corrupted, and unhealthy living person. Though so is a drug dealer... They are both very harmful situations in many ways.

Howmuch wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Anyone? I'm trying to settle a bet.

Women are definitely a full time job.. You should be paid to have them......

why did the boy fall of the bridge? He got shot in the head.

So two friends walk into a bar. One says to the bartender, "Get me a Miller Lite please." The bartender says, "Sure." The other friend says, "Get me a Cosmopolitan please." The bartender stares at him and says, "That is not the drink I was expecting you to order, but I respect your decision."

Have you seen Helen Keller's back porch? Neither did she.

Knock Knock Who is it? Me, I forgot my keys on the way out oh ok...

imagine a world without santa ill make it easy, lookout the window

Q:whats yellow and flys through walls A:A magical Banana

A man walks into a bar with an ape. The ape defecates on the floor. The bartender ordered them both out.

Why did the boy rip out all of his hair? He was insane.

Whats big, white, and will kill you if it falls out of a pine tree? A refrigerator

Person 1: What did the woman say when - Person 2: I know! It doesnt matter, shes a woman

minecraft

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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