If life gives you melons, you might be dyslexic

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do JFK and Hitler have in common? They died.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's red and has wheels a red car....

thumb_up thumb_down +1

how do you kill a jew? inject him/her with gratuitous amounts of cyanide until they cease to have brain function and a pulse.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

why can't Hellen Keller hear? she is deaf.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? 124

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Land Rovers

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's red and creeps up your leg? A homesick abortion.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why don't Polish women use vibrators? They are extremely conservative Catholics.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A- Knock Knock B- Who's there? A- Soccer!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

fkda

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why was the black man excited when he found a $20 bill on the ground? -Anyone would be excited

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Whats worst than getting screwed. Your mother

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How did the snail travel around the world without any help from a transportation device? Sadly, it didn't. The snail is incapable of this kind of long distance travel due to it's small size, lack of speed and short lifespan.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Two fish are in a tank. One says to the other, "You man the guns, i'll drive."

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Because it was a refrigerator. Why did the little girl die? Because she was hit by two monkeys and a refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What is Earth made out of? Earth

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did the man bring home from Africa? AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q: What's the longest word in the dictionary? A: According to the Oxford English Dictionary (second edition), it is "Pseudopseudohypoparathyroidism."

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Did you know that there is no A is "sodimizing"?

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q: Why do so many people write "So a man walked into a bar" A: Because they lack the intellect to think of something creative, and still other peoples material.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

whats worse then a paper cut, the holocaust, whats worse then the holocaust, two paper cuts

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why was the boy sad? He had a Ford Taurus stapled to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops