What do you call: A black person, A white person, A mexican, A Jew, And an athiest? Whatever their names are!

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

Whats brown and smells like shit? Shit.

What's funnier than the Holocaust? Most things, as the Holocaust was a terrible tragedy.

What's another name for a black priest? An African American Priest.

Knock Knock Who's there? The visitor is deaf and therefore does not have the ability to respond.

Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: Doesn't matter, he's not coming

Why doesn't Gary like me? Because I killed his family and fed them to him.

Q:Why did the man get hit by the car? A:He was standing on the road.. ;DDD

Where was Susie when the bomb exploded? Everywhere

The duck says do you smell poop. Ya says the chicken, it wasn't me It was the turkey

Why did Sara fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sara.

Scientist 1: "What's your research paper about?" Scientist 2: "Homosexuality in fruit bats." Scientists 3, 4 & 5: "AHAHAHAHA LOL WUT"

Why wasnt the chicken able to cross the road? Because it was disabled

One time I went into a haunted house. It was just pretend ghosts but then I saw a real ghost there. It was scary.

Whats the difference between a dead baby and a chevrolet? I've never been inside a chevrolet before...

Why did Patrick buy an apple? So he can eat it

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? -Hey! Where's my tractor?

A man walks up to a dead baby. The baby is dead

What's the difference between Mitt Romney and a cheese grader? How the hell should i know?

Penis-Pump

if two couples walk down the street, when do they die? when a pack of rabid dogs eats them.

Miranda Lorenz is a WHORE!!! She has slept with three guys while in a relationship!! then when he broke up with her for cheating on him, she keyed his car!! Psycho Bitch!!!

What did dean carmon say to his brother? - I don't know I'm not his brother

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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