Roses are red Violets are blue I have a knife Take off your clothes

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Why did the dyslexic man walk into the bra, he didn't he walked into a bar.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I threw a fridge at it

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Two dogs walk into a room. What a fine example of two dogs walking into a room.

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how do you wake up lady gaga? scream in her ear.

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Why did the man float in the lake? Because he had more fat than average, so he was very buoyant

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P1 : Yo mamma's so fat... P2: My moms dead

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Someone threw a fridge at her...

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What is the difference between a hore and a wife? The hore serves you...

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What do you call a dog that's half poodle, half bulldog? A dog.

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Why can't Kevin run with scissors? Because he killed himself.

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A Jew sits down next to a muslim at the bar. They great and discuss their day's events, they both order beers. Then they go home.

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What did the boy say 2+2 was? 4

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Q. What's the difference between a movie star and a manikin? A. Nothing.

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Whats worse than an offended chicken walking around with a squirrel stapled to its back? A crusty old man with hepatitis peeing on 10 babies.

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How many small children does it take to change a light bulb? None. Children are not old enough to do this by themselves.

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Why was the black man shot, He resisted against a highly political challenger. Unfortunately for him the Armenian politician was not a very nice guy.

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What did the deer say to the hunter? Deers are animals, they haven't yet evolved enough to talk..

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do you know what i see in the perfect girl? my dick.

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How did the boy fly? he had wings.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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A blonde read the newspaper the other day and she saw "Sarah Piplin-laid by 5000 men" She reported it to the owner of the company as I felt it was not appropriate for a family newspaper. The person at the other end of the line asked the blonde, "are you blonde?" "Yes, how do you know?" she replied. "Because it says Sahara Pipeline, you idiot!"

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anne hatthaway

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Enchilada

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops