Why did the Jew cross the road? He was hungry and there was a McDonalds on the other side of the street.

Why did the man get hit by a van? He was blind, and his guide dog was an idiot.

what do you call a black guy fixing your electricity an electrician

Roses Are red violets are blue I HAVE FIVE FINGERS THE MIDDLE IS FOR U

A tall German man and a short Ukrainian woman walk into a pub and sit down for a drink. The German, not wanting to seem rude, asks the Ukrainian how her day has been. The Ukrainian smiles confusedly as she doesn't understand German.

Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but orange gourds. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

You know what your problem is? I'm too good looking.

how do you kill a jew? inject him/her with gratuitous amounts of cyanide until they cease to have brain function and a pulse.

A dog walks into a bar and succumbs to heartworm.

Holocaust jokes aren't funny. Anne Frankly, they're just out of bad taste.

Chuck Norris.

What did the little girl do with her puppy? She killed it.

what do you do when a woman tells you no? cut her tongue out

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was making a suicide attempt.

A man walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face?" He says, "I have acromegaly"

Why did John scream when he came in to his bedroom? He stepped on a nail

There was a dedicates Muslim man on a plane. He was travelling to Melbourne for a business conference so he could help support his family as well as he can.

What's worse than rush hour traffic? Your childhood friend, Ricky, was just brutally killed by a street cleaner

a little girl is playing outside of her house when i man in a van approaches her and stops to ask if the girl will help him find his puppy and that he has some gandy. seeing as the girl has a great love for animals she gets in the van. the man and the little girl drive around until they find the puppy. the man is so overjoyed her rewards the girl with candy. he then drives her back to her house and she feels wonderful having helped the man find his puppy. the end.

Whats something really annoying? A guy who presses enter too much. hehe

How many anti-joke fans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. Or two if it's a really high bulb and you need a second person to hold the ladder for safety.

What's fat and ginger? My dog.

How do you keep a blonde occupied for hours? Put on an entertaining movie.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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