How do you get a clown to stop smiling Kill him

There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

what does a black car sound like when it starts? RUN-NIGGA-NIGGA-NIGGA-NIGGA -GRANT PARK ALL THE WAY

?????????????????????? ????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????? ???????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ...?????????????????????????????? ?????????????????????????????? ???????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????? ???????????????????????????? ???????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ???????????????????????????? you mad?

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

A man walked into a store and asked if he could use the restroom. They found this acceptable and let him use it.

A robot walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "can I get you a drink?" The robot replies, "No, I'm a robot."

So a bear walks into a bar. Everyone in there goes hysterical with the fright. Two people are killed by it.

If life gives you lemons, you can't really make anything because you lack the proper materials.

The NHL playoffs

How did the gymnast fall off the beam? Got shot in the face

Good for him. Thats wonderful!

What do you call a fish with no eyes? Anything you want, it's only a fish.

What is it called when a male and a male are together. A relationship

A duck walks into a bar and asks the bartender "one beer please." the bartender proceeds to go into shock as a duck just talked to him

what do you call a girl who sells sex for money? sally

whats red, white, and blue? idk go ask the president

Q: How many apples grow on a tree? A: All of them

6

Why does the little boy play video games all the time? Because he is socially awkward and has no friends.

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: slightly aged post it note glue

What do you call a kid with headgear and one leg? Names.

Kid walks into principals office Principal: do you know why I called you down here. Kid: yeah, I punched a kid at lunch. Principal: that's not why I called you down here

Stephen Hawkings was ice skating on the Eiffel Tower... then he woke up.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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