Why do Mexicans like to eat burritos? Because they are delicious, and very filling.

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Why did the all the fish in the lake die? A pesticide bioaccumulated through the food chain.

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Why was there a lion in the bathroom? Because I threw a refrigerator at it and stapled a frog to its butthole, all while it was being chased by a 10 foot scorpion and a purple salmon that only had 1 eye.

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Why did Hitler like his steak well done? Because like many people, he didn't like the sight of blood in his steaks.

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Q:How many prostitutes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Two

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A: Don't hit those black people!!!!! B: Those are trash cans.

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What's worse than biting into your apple and realising it has a worm in it? subsequently realising that the worm is a Swamp Adder, the worlds smallest venemous snake. Then you look up and realise you're in the Sahara Desert. You wonder where the snake came from and how it got in the apple.. Then you slowly die.

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Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Why was the swing in the kitchen?

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So you're walking through the desert and the wheels fall off your canoe, how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 13 because baseballs can't have babies

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind, parapalegic kid get for Christmas? Cancer

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Oh hot damn, this is my jam. Strawberry, to be specific.

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Knock knock Whos there? ... You got ding dong ditched

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A bass player walks past a bar.......... "hey, it could happen"...

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Why didn't the boy respond to the text? His phone had run out of charge.

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whats the difference between a cat and a rooster? who the hell cares, all black people should die

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to its dying chicks who were just run over.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was tied to the first one.

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Chuck Norris watches TV.

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What do you do if Zombies are chasing you and your friend? Trip the friend.

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so an american, a Hispanic, and a Indian walk into a bar in Washington D.C, and the bartender says to the american "I'm sorry, but u have to leave.

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What's worse than losing your phone? Getting raped anal until phones fall out

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The Holocaust.

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What's worse than falling off your bike? Getting hit by a truck.

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Your momma is so fat that she is on a diet and exercises regularly.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops