What do you call an unexpected pregnancy? A defective condom.

What noise does a dead dog make ? Nothing its dead

Why didn't Erick have a party last week? Because his grandma died

What's the difference between a black guy and a picnic table? Many things, really. Beginning with simple structural features such as the number of legs, of which there happen to be four on a generic picnic table, and two on a human being. One might observe that a typical african american male is between 5'8" and 6'2" in total length, whereas a picnic table, being made to support 6-8 people will generally be slightly longer. A black guy will generally be pictured standing upright. A picnic table is usually horizontally laid out upon a flat surface. The former is living or dead, the latter is usually nonliving, processed wood or metal. The former may move about from day to day of its own accord, the latter is completely stationary, and indeed very difficult to relocate, etc.

What did the elephant say to the goldfish? Nothing. Animals are unable to speak and fish aren't able to live on land

your mamma so fat she is homosexual... hahaha to bad u will get last in her

Gracias por depositar mi dinero, y tener un buen día, adios.

why was the boy crying? ... because he had a frog stapled yo his face.

Q: why are black people so good at basketball? A: because the can shoot and steal:)

wanna hear a good joke? neither do I

why did the man blink because i put a gun to his head.

How many cows can you fit in a field? It depends on how big your field is.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

want to hear a joke? Woman's rights

what's worse than a hole in your sock? Getting raped!

The burgler walked into the house. Nobody noticed the initial intrusion. The burgler quickly left. The family of which was stolen from woke up the next day and enjoyed a hearty breakfast of grains, oats, and barley without a worry on anyone's mind.

What's the best part of a family reunion? The sodomy.

Why didn't the blonde get into college? She was killed in a car accident.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

The Treatment of Steve Bartman

Q:why do bananas where sunscreen? A:beacause they peel!!haha

What does a cupcake get for Christmas? A fat kid.

Yo' momma's so fat, she has an increased risk of cardiovascula disease and may die.

Paul Dylan King!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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