GRAAAAAAAAAAAR.

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i am a duck. are you a duck. yes i am a duck.

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See you ******* dogface! All right? You're a compulsive *********** sit on that swivel! Stop swearing!

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Why did the boy have a tumor? Because he had cancer.

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Two goldfish are sat in a tank, one says to the other 'I forgot who you are' to which the other replies 'I forgot what you said'.

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What's the difference between a lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a lamborghini in my garage.

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Why don't they sell pharmaceuticals in the rain forest? Because it is to sparsely populated and not economically viable.

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John:Why couldn't the T-Rex clay his hands? Billy:Because his arms are too small! John:no he's extinct dumbass

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Q: Why did the man have no legs? A: He lost them when his humvee hit a roadside bomb during his last tour in Iraq.

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If a tree falls in the woods, and no one is around to hear it - Is there still a woman in the kitchen?

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Why couldn't the 14 year old find a date? Because he had a speech impediment and girls avoided him usually.

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Why were the sea hawks fans mad at the Super Bowl? Because why would you throw the ball if you have one yard to go

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How did the chicken cross the road? On it's chicken wings.

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Why are cemetaries gated? Typically, to prevent vandalism and the emotional trama it inflicts on the deceaseds' families.

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What did the scientist say to the postman? So your a postman?

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That moment where the screen shouts "HE MAN" And you look at the guy and go... Hmm did they say He-Man or She-Man? HE MAN!

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Do is the Most Famous Line on youtube Answer- Do the Flop

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What did the teacher tell the failing student? You will most likely be kicked out of our school and have no further education and be subjected to a low-level career.

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What did the priest say to the nun? ... I don't know, I wasn't there.

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A:Your so fat that you take up the hole room B:If i am fat,Then i can crush you down thin head!

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What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels

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Little Miss Muffet Sat on a tuffet, Eating her curds and whey; Along came a spider, Who sat down beside her But was offered the window seat, Because this was Little Miss Muffet's stop

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Knock Knock. Whos there? Death

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cms.......?????

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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