What do you call a wine-o? A Alco-colic.

A girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty, He said 'No'. She asked him if he would want to be with her forever. He said 'no'. She then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, Once again, he replied 'no'. She had heard enough. As she walked away, tears streaming down her face the boy grabbed her arm and said.. 'Asking emotionally charged hypothetical questions that are completely irrelevant to the prior conversation is known as fishing for compliments. Except, your tears seem to reflect a more serious inner emotional neediness. I suggest you seek a psychologist.'

Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

cory is gay

what do rappers cover? ->CANDY CREDITS: ANUJ NARAYAN VARMA from Leland high school

Do you ever feel, like a plastic bag? No, because plastic bags are man-made inanimate objects.

Whats funnier than a jew holding a nickel. Nothing. Jews are cheap.

What do call someone who kills their own children? Casey Anthony

What do 10 dead babies in a blender sound like? Idk because I was too busy masturbating

knock knock whos there guy with a gun guy with a gun who guy with a gun who just shot you dammit

Knock Knock Who's There? Ram My Penis Into Ram My Penis Into Who? Me.

why did stacey marry bally because she loves him

Why is the little boy crying on the side of the street? He fell and skinned his knee.

Whats the different between a black man and white man...... the different levels melanin in the skin that results in pigment

knock knock whos there a duck a duck who QUACK!

What did the gay man order at Starbucks? Delicious, handcrafted beverages and great-tasting food. The secret to making life better.

A man walked into a bar. Ouch.

why did the chicken cross the road? to give a doctor the cure for cancer but some ass hole ran him over

Q. Where did Little Timmy go for Christmas? A. Auschwitz

Why do people play video games? Because audio games are not as fun.

What is worse than hell?

A Japanese woman walks into a Korean deli, and asks the Korean man if she can buy some groceries. They are able to get past their cultural differences, and share their favorite recipes.

What happened? I have absolutely no idea.

Dont be silly, you know that everything is relative, and that relativity is as unlimited as the subconscious mind, give me ten more minutes, and I can hypnotize you in five minutes in order to see life in slow motion yourself for as long as you feel like. Just dont expect your body to adjust like mine, meaning that if you try to run, your brain will use its old habits while your perception is used to the slow ones... In other words, you will end up on the floor or smacking into a wall.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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