What does your girlfriend eat every morning that is white, warm and sticky? Oatmeal

knock knock use the doorbell. our door has a hive of bees in it. three ambulances and a pest control squad was at the house five minutes later.

What's big, and fat? Well, duh an elephant.

Why do white people despise black people? Because they are good at everything we suck at.

Why do Jews make sure their cars can stop on a dime? So if something happens unexpectedly when they are driving they have a better chance of avoiding a dangerous collision.

Why did Sara fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sara.

Don't you hate it when ads just [CONGRATULATIONS! YOU HAVE JUST WON A MILLION DOLLARS!* Please click this ad, so you can give us your full name, address, phone number, bank account number, pin number and mail your credit card to us, then you will receive your MILLION DOLLARS!* (you may or may not receive one million dollars) Thank you.] pop up anywhere these days?

What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown suit

Bin Laden comes out of a cave

1234 5

Anne Frank.

What do you call Justin Beiber having sex with a woman? Gay

Why was the little boy crying? He had a frog stapled to his face.

What did the man from Hiroshima see when he looked up at the sky on August 6th, 1945? Some birds.

Why couldn't the man reach the police on his phone after his leg was hacked off by a serial killer? He had AT&T as a service provider.

Why did the gambling addict go into the casino? To use the bathroom

I cat tried to jump over a fence It was electrified

timmy: a duck walks up to a lemon stand and says to the man running the stand hey... Paul: what r u talking about its duck it can't talk

what did one mexican say to the other Hi.

Hickory Dickory Dock mother is a whore

Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

a chinese man and an irishman walk into a bar. This is odd because these men are from countries extremely far apart from one another

What did George Washington say to his men before they crossed the Delaware? Get in the boat.

Why did the man have no head? He did it was under his shirt

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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