Knock Knock.... Knock Knock.... Knock Knock.... I guess no ones home.

Why was Veronica lying on the sidewalk? She was just in a drive-by shooting.

How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

Whats purple and fluffy? Purple Fluff

Knock Knock Who's there? The Police. *No Answer* The Police then give the S.W.A.T team the signal, and bust down the door and kill 15 high profile targets issued by Liberia. The man who did not answer the door is Carlos Pedrojeuz, a serial killer, meth addict who has been a part of the sex slave trade for a decade. One might think of answering the door next time.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust.

Whats red and hurts if it hits you in the face? a brick

What do you call a puppy with no eyes? Ugly,

- Ask me if I'm a firetruck. - Are you a firetruck? - No.

Why did Jill fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why didn't Jill get up? She had no legs. Why didn't anyone help Jill up? She had no friends.

Knock Knock Who's There Gary Oh hi Gary, come in

you will now laugh.

A black man walks into a store and grabs something off of a shelf. He walks briskly towards the door and pauses, looking sneakily left and right to make sure nobody else is around. He also looks and sees that the security camera is not facing him. Seeing as nobody is watching him, he quickly turns towards the counter beside the door and pays for the item with his own debit card, knowing that nobody can see him enter his PIN.

Yo' Mama so nice that she donated a kidney and saved a life

Why did the boy fall in the hole? He had no eyes

what do you get when you get when you cross a chicken and a mad scientists a mutant chicken

knock knock 'who's there?' 'just open the door'

Two drums and a cymbal fall down a cliff. Ba-dum pssh.

why is 4 afraid of 5? Because Monkey's eat purple pineapples

What do you call a needle with two points? A two headed needle.

What begins with "F" and ends in "uck"? There are multiple words or words that begin with "F" and end in "uck." So you dont need me to tell you, be creative.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

Why did the boy cross the road Because he needed to get to the bus stop

Do you know what a deaf guy says to a blind guy? God told me you'll see your path.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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