Why was the pilot suspended from flight? He was the terrorist who caused 911. OUCHH

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whats better than a car. gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

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A woman walks out of the kitchen.

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Q: Why do Japanese people have eyes that look like they're stretched to the side of their head? A: When they are born, they come out head first, and their eyes are stretched to the side of their head and are stuck in that position due to the sticky, glue like substance found inside a woman's stomach.

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Immediately following his inauguration, Bush called Obama into the oval office for a private meeting and some words of advice. Bush and Obama shook hands as gentlemen do and then Bush asked if Obama wanted to hear a joke. Obama eagerly said yes, "Good..." Bush said, handing Obama a battered copy of the United States Constitution, "...the joke is in your hands", and with that Bush turned and left.

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What do you call a pig sizzling in a pan? BACON!

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Why did the Flyers lose to the Blackhawks in the Stanley Cup? Because they aren't as good as the Blackhawks.

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you pick up 10 students from a school, you buy a pish from the fet store, and then drive to new york whos driving the bus? a fat guy with a level 80 org in world of warcraft

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Why is that blond girl so dumb? Because she has fetal alcohol syndrome.

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Fuck yourself you piece of shit.

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Roses are red hulk is green, I'd smash that ass, If you know what I mean !

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Did you know Helen Keller had a swingset? Neither did she.

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I got it Nero, lets just be friends for now and forget about the work I do here and you there.

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what did the downsindrome get for christmas?? A: Aids and a Dead wife

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Why cant women drive? Actually, they can

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Why did the red head smoke a lot of meth? He had extreme psychological disorders due to years of abuse from peers and even family. He also had severe ADHD and had an extremely addictive personality type which made him succeptable to drug abuse. After years of therapy and failed family interventions, he dies from a meth OD.

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What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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Whats sad about 3 mexicans getting hit by a train They were remodeling my kitchen

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Why do gorillas have big nostrils? Have you seen the size of their fingers!?!?!

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Contrary to popular belief- And this just in. My daughter has breast cancer.

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Do you know the Muffin Man? Of course you don't, faggot.

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What do you call a puppy with no eyes? Ugly,

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Ask me if I´m an orange. Are you an orange? No I? a person.

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When geese fly, they often fly in a V-formation. Why is one side of the V is always longer than the other? Because there are more birds on that side.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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