A guy and a girl look at a dog licking his crotch and the guy utters "damn I wish I could do that" The girl says: I can totally do that! "really? prove it" the guy says. The girl walks towards the dog and says "you just need to pet him so he don't bite you"

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How many Grand Jurists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Depends on if it was a cop that snuffed out the light bulb.

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What do you call a man that likes fishsticks? His name

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Noobz -wondering why your valid anti-joke is getting voted down? Simply because it's a repeat, someone else has already submitted it. Only the original is valid for positive to votes. The regulars on here willallvote a repeat down immediately. I have 3 accounts set upwith different IP's just to do that. You have been warned. Search first mo fo's

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Why was the black man pulled over? He was going 10 miles over the speed limit.

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What's worse than a School Bus accident? The Holocaust.

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gay rights

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In Soviet Russia! People were much more finacially secure than they are now.

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How many Jews can you fit into a car? About 5 or 6. It depends on the size of the car.

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How big is Justin Bieber's penis? 10 inches, and its in his ass, and its actually Usher's penis

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Who broke into the village's homes and smashed all of the vases? Link did.

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why is black such a deprssing color because it symbolizes death

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Five little monkeys jumping on the bed One fell down and bumped his head He suffered a serious concussion and was never the same again.

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What's black and white and red all over? A black, white, and red painting.

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Why is the boy severely mentally scarred? He got raped.

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Q. what did the refuge from uganda say to his mom when he was riding his bike A. look ma no hands.....

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Why didn't the boy run the marathon? He was cripple.

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why didnt you take a shower? because my house burnt down

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What's funny about being adopted? Your parents never loved you

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What did the boy do when he was bored and broke? He took to the streets selling illicit drugs such as cocaine. Although dangerous, the rush from said danger solved his boredom problem. On top of this, there is a huge market for such substances and he was not broke for much longer.

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Why was the truck covered in blood? The chicken tried crossing the road

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Last week, I saw a film. As I recall it was a horror film.

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Johnson stops eating

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The seven dwarfs were in a sauna feeling happy. So Happy got up and left.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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