Shit I forgot to put the slash. Thang god for google

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Why did the tortoise beat the hare. The tortoise had carcinoma thyroid cancer in the renal pelvis uterur.

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Little Timmy walked up to the teacher and asked her "Can i go to the restroom?" The teacher said " I don't know, CAN you ?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple, finding a apple in your worm.

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In soviet Russia - some people were poor.

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The pennis has a tuff life, his best friend is a pussy, his neighbors is an A hole, his family is nuts, and his master beats him.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who, Your Doctor, you have 5 months to live

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A rabbi, a preist, and a homosexual are at a bar... What a fine example of a well cultured community.

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Who taught Chuck Norris? -Chuck Norris

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What did the dead baby say to his mother? Nothing. He's dead.

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why was six afraid of seven? cause seven raped and pillaged eight's family.

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where do the women go? the womanarium

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Your mama so fat she often lays awake at night wondering if your father is happy with their sex life. He isn't.

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whats worss than getting a papercut gohnnarea

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a large dog on its side of the road attempting to harass it.

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di you hear about the man that got his whole left side cut off? no well he died

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do you know what i see in the perfect girl? my dick.

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So I'm balls deep in this turkey dinner....... then i proceed to ejaculate into it and ruin my family's Thanksgiving along with their perception of me.

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Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

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Why did the monkey scream? He was hungry

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What is the difference between a pile of dead baby's and a Lamborghini I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

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What did the man say when he dropped an apple on his foot? That might have caused some minor discomfort had I not been wearing shoes.

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Two gay men in a hottub. They relaxed for about half an hour before getting out and going to the bed, where they fell asleep.

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a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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