If thin people skinny dip, what do fat people do? Sink

onranges are orange bananas are yellow and apples are red/green ................... and im ................. PINK (lw/kc)

why wouldn't the printer print? because it had no ink.

What do a grape and a reindeer have in common? They're both purple, except the reindeer.

Why did the cow die? Because we need meat

Your mom is so fat that she sat on a rock.

A scottish and a mexican were walking on the streets when the mexican got hit by a car. The scottish man called the ambulance and walkked away.

You can lead a horse to water, but you can't put it in a basket.

how do make a condom fly around the room? Piss it off!

What's big, red and eats rocks? A big, red Rock-Eater

What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing. Fruits can't talk.

Robocop and T-800 where fighting, first the T-800 manages to injure Robocop critically, but Robocop manages to repair himself and break T-800`s legs off, which T-800 suddenly regrows due to an unexpected upgrade. After several hours of combat, where civilians are injured and half the town is destroyed they where both worn out, but ready for one last struggle... ...Eventually there was a great celebration for whoever won.

Goon Bear+Homo= Corey Jacobs True Story

There are 4 people in a crashing plane, but there are only 3 parachutes. But, the teenage girl says she is depressed and cannot go on. The older woman breaks down into tears because she is reminded of her rough child hood. The two 21 year old twins start crying, too, because they were corrupted by their alcoholic father who would come home and abuse their family. As they were all crying, the two pilots and the flight attendant took the parachutes and jumped. The older woman realized she went to flight school when she was young so she took control. They were are happy and drank a little bit too much alcohol and got drunk. The pilot also drunk and crashed into a huge skyscraper. This catastrophe was later named 9/11.

A soccer player, a basketball player, a football player, a hockey player, and a baseball player all walk into a bar at different time periods of the day

Knock Knock. Who's there? Guitar. Guiar who? Violin.

Why isn't Neil Patrick Harris like Barney Stinson in real life? Because he's gay

Why was the jewish girl happy? Her pussy was wet!

That's a lie, buffaloes are extinct now

stuff and dogs {()}

You might be a redneck if you are from a rural area and act as such.

I am not racist, racism is a crime! Crime is for black people.

solve y = [1 arctan (x)] / [2-3 arctan (x)]

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Holy ****, I'm in heaven.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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