What's black and hangs from my tree? A black man. I am a racist.

What iz stupid? Hibiyav

what do you call a man with no legs? disabled.

What does D.N.A. stand for? Deoxyribonucleic Acid

The new pickup line. The human body has 206 bones in it. I have broken one of them, please take me to a hospital.

What happens if Pinoccio says my nose is about to grow?

... and so the rabbi says "Don't worry. It was a kosher pickle anyway."

sixty....eight.

*via text message* Me: Hey Trevor! You at home? Trevor: This is Trevor's mom. Trevor committed suicide today.. Me: OMG! Why?!? Trevor: Because when I gave him a glass of water, it had 3 ice cubes. Trevor doesn't like odd numbers.

potato farming

Yo mama is so fat that you are constantly ridiculed by the local kids and constantly hope that the obesity isn't hereditary.

whats worse then finding out your girlfriend cheated on you.. -9/11

Life is like a box of chocolates, it doesn't last as long for fat people...

I'm not wearing any underwear. Why? Because I am have built in underwear. ;)

So a man rapes a little girl but rips her eyes out before he does it. In court he said the appropriate thing about this was that she could not see it cuming.

Why was the plumber very sad Because i killed his family

Whats the worst part about being fat? Your fat.

What is brown and sticky? The substance used to line your stomach when getting your stomach pumped.

Whats the difference between a black man and a white man? Their skin color

What do you call a man who gets off the train at Willoughby? Dead

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she didn't have woman's rights Knock knock Who's there? NOT Sally, she's in the kitchen

Why did the ant cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

Why was the elderly, Asian, blond pulled over by the officer? She was, and has been completely blind since birth.

What do Laura Bush and 9/11 have in common? George Bush did them.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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