What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Statutory Rape.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Ronald McDonald was chasing him.

killing a baby and putting it in one bucket is one thing... but killing a baby and putting it in ten buckets is just insensitive

What's the capital of Thailand? The letter 'T'...

Why did little Johnny eat his homework? Because his family is very poor and he rarely eats.

A man runs into a psychiatrist's office and screams, "You gotta help me doc! I just killed seven people in my office building!"

Why couldn't Jimmy ride his bike? His family had to sell it in order to put food on the table

A man sees the doctor. "Doctor, if I hit myself on my head, it hurts, if I hit myself on my arm, it hurts, and if I hit myself on my leg, it hurts as well." "The case is clear. You need to f*ing stop hitting yourself!"

My mom's dead

Why couldn't Little Timmy see the pirate movie? Because Little Timmy was blind.

wait am i supposed to right the joke down here

Two ducks are sitting in the bathtub. One asks, "Hey, can you please pass the soap?" The other responds, "Sure, if you pass the typewriter."

the your face joke

A Jew, a Muslim, and a homosexual jump from a cliff to see who gets to the bottom first. Who wins? Society.

Roses are black biolets are black I colorblind

Busted? What the hell is going on?

a guy takes viatamins thinking they would help him be healthy he choked and then he died from choking on a jolly rancher

Why do I hate Jews? - Because they use to much space in the oven.

What couldn't Little Timmy see the pirate movie? Because Little Timmy was blind.

When Jesus came back from the dead the first thing he said was "It was just a prank bro!"

"Knock, Knock" "Go away, I have a lot of stuff to do right now and knock knock jokes suck."

How do you drown a blonde? From her infancy, instill in her a dread of the water. Keep her away from baths and showers, protect her from pools, and as the child grows, regale her nightly with terrible stories about the cruelty of the sea. When she has matured past 18, take her out to the middle of a lake on a boat and push her in.

I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus, the divorce papers were filed soon thereafter.

Connor "Rusty" McLeod

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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