What did my mom get for christmas? My dad, D1ck in a box. My dad's name is Richard.

"Hello." "Hi."

A black guy, a mexican, and a jew walk in a bar. The mexican had to go to the bathroom. He asked the bartender where the bathroom was and she directed him down the hall where he pooped in quietly.

Ever heard about the gray pipes that ran along the walls? Those pipes transmit gas. Gas killed the jews. You sick fucker.

What did one muffin say to the other? I don't know, but you need a psychiatrist.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause your mom has cancer

Your momma's so fat that when she uses a hoolahoop, she gets tired after one try and has to stop.

Why do I hate Jews? - Because they use to much space in the oven.

Whats worse than being a Jew? Being black.

What couldn't Little Timmy see the pirate movie? Because Little Timmy was blind.

Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide.

What do you call someone that hates gay people? An asshole.

When Jesus came back from the dead the first thing he said was "It was just a prank bro!"

Where does a leper go every Monday and Wednesday? The dermatologist.

Why did the baby cross the road? It doesn't matter. He was hit by a bus.

What makes the turtle move? It's legs.

I used to think I was indecisive, but now I am not so sure.

What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

What did the husband tell his obese wife? I love you honey

What do you call 4 Mexicans hopping the border? 4 Mexicans in search of a better lifestyle from poverty.

Life is like a box of chocolates. You eat them. get fat. Die.

what's the funniest anti joke? not this one

What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

The burgler walked into the house. Nobody noticed the initial intrusion. The burgler quickly left. The family of which was stolen from woke up the next day and enjoyed a hearty breakfast of grains, oats, and barley without a worry on anyone's mind.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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