I don't always finish my sentences but when I do...

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Sit on Santas lap Boner

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Why didn't the black man finish high school? He overdosed on heroin.

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Why are there no Mexican people on Star Trek? Because the casting director screened thousands of actors and actresses and assembled what he/she felt was the most talented cast to create and sustain a long running television series. Unfortunately no one of Mexican dissent was awarded a role.

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there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

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25

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roses are red violets are blue last time I saw u were in a zoo don't worry ill be there to not in a cage but laughing at u

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Some poems don't rhyme, This one doesn't.

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What happened september 11th, 2001 It was my first time snorkoling in Hawaii

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What's the difference between a ferrari and a sack of babies? I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

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why did the first monkey fall out the tree? he was dead why did the second monkey fall out the tree? he was hit by the first one why did the third monkey fall out the tree? peer pressure why did the fourth monkey fall out the tree? he thought it was a game

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What did the patient say when the doctor told him he had aids? "Oh my god. Are you sure?"

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Anal cheese curds.

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Why was the chimp late for his flight? Because chimps arent allowed through airport security.

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What did the man do when he saw the dog? Ran it over

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What's worse than a baby in a car accident? The baby survives and has a mental problem, grows up, and then drives the same car and gets in another accident.

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There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

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what do you call a black person in a electronic store? a customer

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A man walks to a bar. He drinks too much and dies. His family is informed later that evening.

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? A blue waffle.

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Why is there velcro on the edge of the table. Because its there to hold the microwave.

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How do you know when someone tells a bad joke? You don't find it humorous.

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A man sees the doctor. "Doctor, if I hit myself on my head, it hurts, if I hit myself on my arm, it hurts, and if I hit myself on my leg, it hurts as well." "The case is clear. You need to f*ing stop hitting yourself!"

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Milk, milk, lemonade, around the corner fudge is made. This market has a very dynamic and fresh selection.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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