What did the apple tree say to the farmer? Well! since trees nor apples have the ability to talk I would say the apple tree said nothing. And if the farmer thinks it did say something he should visit the doctors to check his hearing. The End.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Relax, and I do not mean as in hypnotic "relax as you do not not... Okay I used it again I am just joking" Nice, so are they like pretty doubles or not?

thumb_up thumb_down +46

A Poem that would be from a stocker: Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have a Gun Get in the Van and NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Why did the blind man commit suicide? Cause his wife was so ugly he went blind and become depressed a shot himself...twice.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Wanna hear a joke? No.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Two drunk men were in a bar fight, they smashed beer bottles on each others heads and walked away because it hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Q:What did the policemen say to the other policemen? A:Safe

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Nah

thumb_up thumb_down +40

You're momma's so fat, that I just wanna go over there and make hot passionate love to her. What? I'm a chubby chaser.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Where did Betsy go after the explosion? Everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What Starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Why was John sad? His parents were murdered.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

whats stupid and likes dumb jokes? you.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am a whore, Let's have sex.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Whats black and has a large penis? A dog with large genitalia.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

When was Timothy born? He wasn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Two muffins were in an oven. Neither of them said anything because they are inanimate objects. After they were finished baking, they were pulled out and set to cool on a counter to be eaten at a later time.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What did the black say when an asian knocked him out? Nothing, he was knocked out

thumb_up thumb_down +36

A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Why was the black man sad? People were frequently talking and whispering about his dark colouring behind his back. Also he had no legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What do you call a black guy with Alzheimer's? TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Rebbeca black walked into a bar on Saturday

thumb_up thumb_down +34

The chicken came before the egg. Because eggs are an unborn chicken, and it is impossible for an unborn chicken to ejaculate.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Wanna hear a joke? The 19th amendment

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops