Q: What did the anorexic girl do for thanksgiving? A: Nothing, she was paralyzed from a fall 2 days prior and nobody had found her yet.

Doctor: “Knock Knock” Patient: “Who's there?” Doctor: “The interrupting Doctor” Patient: “The inter- Doctor: You have cancer.

How do you catch a squirrel? Use a live, humane trap, and release it back into the wild afterwards.

Why is Justin beaber so white? Because his mother and father both are.

What's the difference between and onion and a dead baby? There is a big difference.

a man walks into a bar..... the man pulls out a gun and robs the place as he is exiting he bumps into a child the child falls in the street and is crushed by a bus. the bus in an attempt to avoid the child swerves and hits a maternity clinic next to a gas station that promptly explodes. the robber so distraught he trys to shoot himself but the gun misfired and the man was arrested and was raped repeatedly in prison...he now has aids...

whats the difference between a blonde and a brunette? A. Genetics.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I don't have cancer, but you do. Love, your doctor.

I hate being bipolar, it's so awesome.

How can you confuse a blonde? Give her a calculus worksheet that she hasn't learned how to do.

What did Jesus say to the Easter Rabbit? Nothing, it ran off before he could say anything. They're so skiddish, those pesky rabbits...

Knock Knock. Whos there? Satan.

What do you call a black man selling drugs? A pharmacist

When life gives you lemons, throw them away. Nobody likes lemons.

So a man was walking down the street with bananas in his ears when he saw one of his friends coming the other way. When they met up the one friend asked, "Hey you know you've got bananas in your ears?" To which the man replied "What? I can't hear you, I have bananas in my ears."

What do you get when you mix a fox and a sloth? a..FOTH

why was the girl in the corner with a knife? she's an emo

- knock knock. ... - knock knock. ... - heey! ... (There is nobody at home.)

HTML

What did the deer say to the hunter? Deers are animals, they haven't yet evolved enough to talk..

why wouldn't the printer print? because it had no ink.

Hey what time is it. 3:15

potato farming

That long? I was thinking more like two hours? An hour?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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