what is fat and ugly. fat and ugly people

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Penis.

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How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it. How do you make it stop crying? You throw another brick at it.

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Your mama is so....well we've been friends since childhood and I know your mother passed away recently. So, as to refrain from being an insensitive jerk to a good friend. I will tell this joke to someone with a mother who is fat, dumb, lazy, ugly, or has a combination of these traits. Or has none of these and happens to be a nice lady with a son/daughter who just enjoys a good mama joke.

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What's worse than a School Bus accident? The Holocaust.

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A blond walked into a bar. A guy picked her up and then they had sex.

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What's the difference between peanut butter and jam? Peanut butter is a food paste made primarily from dry roasted peanuts, while jam is a product made with whole fruit, that is cut into pieces or crushed.

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What did the racist slave owner do when his slave refused to complete his task? Asked him nicely until the task was completed.

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How do you get a black man off a swing? ask him.

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Why did the small child fall down the stairs? Because he had lung cancer was in a wheel chair and I was incredibly tempted to push him down the stairs.

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Why is the grass always greener on the other side? because they have a landscaper.

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whats worse the being in a car crash? finding out that your mother and father were in the other car and were fatally injured.

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What's blue and smells like pee? Pee, I lied about the color

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Knock Knock Whos there Reality* Knock Knock *Opens Door*

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb. Two. But it would have to be a very big lightbulb to fit both of them in there.

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What's worse than 20 babies stapled to one tree? Getting life imprisonment after...

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Q.What's worse than running over a dog on the road? A.9/11

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An Asian oceanographer went scuba diving in the Pacific Ocean. Three days later the coast guard found his remains torn apart by sharks.

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Why did the girl hang herself? She was constantly bullied in school and on the internet.

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how do u get a nun off the bottom of a cruise ship you untie her

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whats orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot

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A rabbi, a preist, and a homosexual are at a bar... What a fine example of a well cultured community.

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Looks through the peephole.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No? Neither have they.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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