How do you drown a blonde? From her infancy, instill in her a dread of the water. Keep her away from baths and showers, protect her from pools, and as the child grows, regale her nightly with terrible stories about the cruelty of the sea. When she has matured past 18, take her out to the middle of a lake on a boat and push her in.

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

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"What starts with F and ends with a K?" "firetruck?" "no, f u c k"

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What happend when Chuck Norris did a push up? He did one push up.

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minorities.

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What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper with some red stuff on it.

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Dying of terminal cancer.

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If you have alzeimers, wait, never mind i forget.

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Why cant i stand up? Cause i shat my pants

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A man and a women have a conversation. Man: what's 2 + 2 Woman: four. Man: you're correct.

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What did the man say to his son? Hello, son.

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Saddam Hussein is the father of the mothers of all cultchies.

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Your argument is invalid, but I will allow you your opinion nonetheless.

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Roses are red. Violets are red. Everything is red. I soaked it in the blood of small children.

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A man walks into a bar, then he realized he didn't have any money, so he walked out.

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What do you call a blond harvesting penuts a penut farmer.

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Hello, ladies, look at your man, now back to me, now back at your man, now back to me. Sadly, he isn’t me, but if he stopped using ladies scented body wash and switched to Old Spice, he could smell like he’s me. Look down, back up, where are you? You’re on a boat with the man your man could smell like. What’s in your hand, back at me. I have it, it’s an oyster with two tickets to that thing you love. Look again, the tickets are now diamonds. Anything is possible when your man smells like Old Spice and not a lady. I’m on Sarah Jessica Parker.

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Whats the difference between a black guy and a pizza? A black guy is a human being, and a pizza is a food you racist.

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women's rights

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WNBA

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Chocolate Bananas with Brocclie.wom

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How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Who knows? They all just sit and bitch about it.

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What do you call a black person playing basketball? An athlete.

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What did David say to Goliath? Not sure, does anyone have a Bible?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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