A duck walks into a 7-11 and says "Give me some chapstick, put it on my bill!" But the cash register attendee doesn't speak English and cannot understand him. He does, however, question whether his God is punishing him because as all people know, Ducks cannot speak, however, this hallucination must be punishment for a horrid misdeed. The employee breaks down into tears and begins reciting prayer. The duck, slightly miffed, walks out, pondering why he'd need chapstick anyway, since he has no lips.

why do girls like 77? ................ ...................... ................. ...................... ................ becuz they get 8 more :P

When I'm through with you... They will never find your body... And even if they did... All they find would be teeth!!!

Q: Why didn't the chicken cross the road. A: because he's a chicken?

What did the penguin say to the polar bear? Your in the wrong hemisphere

Ancient Greeks rights

Penis

Yo momma is so fat that she is large.

What's the difference between a ferrari and a sack of babies? I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

why did the boy dress up like a girl? because he has autism.

Q.What does chuck norris eat as breakfast? ans.FOOD

No

I only like NY as a friend.

A man walks into a bar. Now, that's unheard of !

What flys? A fly

What do you get when you mix red and yellow? Orange.

what has a huge nose and is jewish??? Henery Miller!!!!!

Q: Why did the young boy run away from girls and screamed that they had cooties? A: That's what little boys do. He also has an abusive home life

What's worse than dropping your phone in the toilet? Drinking only milk and honey for 7 days and then getting diarrhea while lying chained up completely naked with red fire ants going up your anus and all over your body while you get eaten alive in slow painfully miserable death

Whats worse than ten babies in one bin? One baby in ten bins.

A horse walks into a bar. It neighs and knocks over a few tables before leaving the bar confused.

What would Martin Luther King Jr. be today if he was white? Alive.

Why can't Ray Charles drive? Because he's blind? No, because he's dead

Why did little Susie light herself on fire? Answer: She wanted to be warm

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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