How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it. How do you make it stop crying? You throw another brick at it.

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Whats green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree you'll die? A pool table.

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What do you call a woman who has one leg that's shorter than the other? Asymmetrical.

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Do you know why your mom is so bold? Becaus she's got cancer

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Where did Betsy go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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3 men walk into a bar. The fourth one ducks.

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Why couldn't the blonde divide 5 by 0? Because it's impossible to divide by 0.

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What did the man say to his wife? Go make me a sandwich!

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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How many Alzheimer patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side!

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Why was my teacher depressed? Because she wanted to live in her pasta

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If there are 3 black men as passengers in a car, who is driving? The person who is operating the vehicle.

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A black man and a Mexican are hired as day laborers by a white man. The black man cleans the house while the Mexican mows and trims the yard. Both are hard-working and attempting to provide for their families in a down economy.

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What did the man say to his son? Hello, son.

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"How come the week takes so long but the weekend goes by so fast" "Because there are five days in the week and two in the weekend"

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What if I told you that our role our "little team" is not as little as you think?

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Womens rights. Are extremely valuable because women are equal.

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A Mexican walked away from a construction site.

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What did the black man say to the other black man? Nothing, he was recently involved in a terrible car accident which he barely survived but lost the function of speech and was paralysed from the neck downwards. He is constantly in pain and desperately wants someone to kill him but has no way of communicating this so is forced to wait until his natural death.

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Tomorrow, today's yesterday.

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Q: Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? A: Because she is a woman.

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What is the difference between my elbow and my penis? I Cant lick my elbow

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Why was Adam sad his dog got ran over? He was holding the dog.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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