Did you know it is impossible to say "Good eye might" and not sound Australian...

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Your dad is so gay, he does not have a girlfriend.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

So a man dipped his balls in sloppy joe sauce.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 is black.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the man buy a rope? Because he needed a noose

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Your mama's so fat, she's dead!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Cry me a river. then try and build a bridge, fail, and walk away frustrated

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How do you stop a speeding car? Put your foot on the Brake

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did Sally not get her permission slip signed? Because her parents where murdered. Why did Sally not think to ask her grandparents? Because there in jail for killing her parents.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

I have read and agree to the Terms of Service

thumb_up thumb_down -21

An amputee walks into a bar with a big smile on his face and sits down. The bartender looks over at him and asks "How did you lose your arm?" The amputee doesn't respond because he has been deaf and mute since birth.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Blonde hair is the result of having two recessive alleles for hair color in your genotype. There is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What's black, over twelve inches long, and has a hard time fitting in tight spaces? my double stroller.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

So i was walking down the street and this guy was really excited. I said "what is so Exciting?" He said "i just saw Justin bieber kiss a girl."

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A man and his wife are walking home from a lovely evening at the movies when suddenly a masked man jumps from the bushes demanding a pad and pen, his mother just got a new phone number and he suffers from short term memory loss.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What's the difference between a black guy and a picnic table? Many things, really. Beginning with simple structural features such as the number of legs, of which there happen to be four on a generic picnic table, and two on a human being. One might observe that a typical african american male is between 5'8" and 6'2" in total length, whereas a picnic table, being made to support 6-8 people will generally be slightly longer. A black guy will generally be pictured standing upright. A picnic table is usually horizontally laid out upon a flat surface. The former is living or dead, the latter is usually nonliving, processed wood or metal. The former may move about from day to day of its own accord, the latter is completely stationary, and indeed very difficult to relocate, etc.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

BUTTERFARTING

thumb_up thumb_down -31

your moms so fat she has a heart attack when she walks to the pantry.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What did the plane say after it flew into the World Trade Center on 9/11 Nothing, planes are incapable of speaking.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Whats the worst thing that happened in the holocaust? it ended

thumb_up thumb_down -31

A murderer takes you hostage. He lists three ways that you will die, but he lets you choose your death: 1. A bullet in your head. 2. A knife in your heart. 3. A lethal injection. What do you choose? It doesn't matter. You're dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Why couldn't Little Timmy see the pirate movie? Because Little Timmy was blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops