Why was Susie screaming profusely? Susie has autism.

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Roses are burning, Violets are burning, my house is on fire

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George Bush.

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What's big, and fat? Well, duh an elephant.

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A young boy is concerned about his fathers health, due to the fact he may have cancer. Turns out, he doesn't. So they got ice cream.

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If a midget is mentally retarded and always late for work, is it okay to call him a little tardy?

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what is green and has wheels? grass i lied about the wheels

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I LIKE TURLES.

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What did Gene give Carla for Christmas? AIDS

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Why would anyone try to run from a fight if:Its not the size of the dog in the fight, its the size of the fight in the dog? I wasn't even talking about dogs and fight isn't something in you! Next time, don't listen to your football coach.

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What's the difference between a vegetable and my son? Nothing

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whats worse then finding a finger in your soup? - being a cook and losing a finger

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Why did the woman make a sandwich? She was hungry

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Why do black people love watermelon? It's simply delicious.

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You know what helps with sholder pain? If you lick my butthole.

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to smash with a sledgehammer. The other one's a watermelon

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Did you hear about the red ship and the blue ship that collided? Everyone on board died.

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minorities

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whats the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? the wheelchair

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a women picks up her phone and screams! There were 3 missed calls from her mother-inlaw

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Q. What's black and white and red all over? A. Certainly not a newspaper. Nobody reads those anymore.

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Why did the mexican cross the road....... To find work so he can support his starving family

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What's the difference between an alcoholic and a drug dealer? An alcoholic is an extremely corrupted, and unhealthy living person. Though so is a drug dealer... They are both very harmful situations in many ways.

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A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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