That maternal figure of yours is of such inadequate intelligence that she cannot fathom that, given a scatterplot with a linear correlation of greater than -1 and lesser than 1 and a reasonably consistent rise over run, a future value along the y-axis can be predicted if following the y=a(x)+b equation.

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A boy goes into Mourne View and meets a girl what happens next? He's now a father living off of the dole.

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Damn kids and their evasive tactics.

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DANA

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A man. That is all.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue.

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If you saw two cowboys in a kitchen, which would be the real one? Why do you automatically assume one of them is false, or that either of them is real?

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What's even faster than the speed of light? The speed you close out of porn when you hear someone coming into the room.

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What's black and white, and red all over? newspaper...

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Whats gets stiff when you have sex with it? A dead body.

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(insert Anti-Joke here)

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have schizophrenia, and don't have any friends

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A man asked another man what he was doing the next day. The man then proceeded to tell him that he had not intended on having any plans due to the fact that he was planning on killing himself within the next twenty three hours.

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Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Kookaburra.Tweet.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was suicidal.

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Gadaffi

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What does a good joke get for Christmas? no laughs.

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WHY DID THE KID RID HIS BRICK HE WAS BLIND

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? You set her on fire.

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Obama.

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What's the leading cause of pedophilia? Sexy kids.

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A man walks into a bar. He says ow

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Your momma is so fat that the late, great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook her breasts for clocks

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Who is the richest clown? You're probably thinking Ronald McDonald but its actually Barack Obama

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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