Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? I stapled it to the first monkey!

Why did the thief steal the kitchen sink? Everything else was stolen by another thief earlier in the day.

Why did he die? He was sick.

What did the alcoholic do when he finished his beer? Opened another one.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, sorry i gave you Herpes type 2.

whats the differnce between a baby and a dart board? dart boards dont bleed.

Knock knock Who's there? Police Police who? You're under arrest, open up or we'll knock your door down.

Why couldnt the black man drink from the water fountain? Because the water fountain was broken.

KEVIN HART

yo mama's so sexy... wait, thats not how it goes

knock knock you may come in

If a midget is mentally retarded and always late for work, is it okay to call him a little tardy?

What's worse than losing your phone? 9/11

Penis

Why was the boy un-able to talk He was retarded

Want to hear a joke about my penis? Nevermind it's too long.

FOLLOW ME @airvvv

What's 9 +10 19

What's worse than a giant paint bubble? TWO GIANT PAINT BUBBLES!

why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 8 9

Roses are #FF0000 Violets are #0000FF

knock, knock Sho'sthere? Sam who? Sam Butt

What's the difference between black people and dog shit? One of them eventually turns white and stops smelling.

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. Your family is dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...