What does a person that is fasting get for Christmas? Food.

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Yo Mama is so ugly she wears a mask on halloween

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Why did the older man begin to walk faster after a black man started walking towards him? He was late for work.

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How Do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the door put the elephant in and close the door. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the door take the elephant out put the giraffe in and close the door. The lion king has a meeting with all the animals but one doesn't turn up, which one is it? The giraffe because it's still in the fridge.

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Why did the man throw the clock out the window? The man's loving family had recently been murdered, and the clock was a constant reminder of their mortality, as it had served as the center of those horrific events.

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If life gives you melons.. You're just plain retarded.

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Knock knock! Who's there? The police. There was a severe accident not long ago. Your family are dead.

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PENIS

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Why did the lemming jump off a cliff? Because he was suicidal.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Cripling social anxiety.

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What did the man do when he went to the toilet went toilet

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a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

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roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

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one fish two fish red fish kill the fish

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Knock Knock! Come in.

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Is this the krusty krab? No, this is Patrick

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Why did the Mexican drive the car off cliff? Because he wanted to.

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Who ate the cookies? Your face. Litterally.

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Holocaust jokes aren't funny. Anne Frankly, they're just out of bad taste.

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A man with Tourettes walks into his Daughter's kindergarten classroom. Fortunately, he was able to control himself and refrain from any outbursts of profanity during the visit.

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Why was Johnny crying? Because... Because... Because... Because... Because... Because of the wonderful things he does.

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Penis

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How do you get your wife to stop nagging? chop off her head

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How do you make an antijoke corny. How? Corn.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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