DON'T expect the unexpected, you don't want to KILL the unexpected ;-)

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Why did a guy with a lisp, v-neck, and piercings pee while sitting down? His joints hurt.

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what's the difference between a bearded man and bearded lady the bearded man has a PENIS

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How do you get your wife to stop nagging? chop off her head

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How do you make a girl happy then sad within 5 seconds? Buy her a pony and then shoot it

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Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident. Your spouse is in hospital.

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Excuses are like butt holes...they are round

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Roses are green Violets are green I'm colour blind Everything is green

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Two men are sitting in a bar. They finish their drinks and pay the bill before leaving.

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What do cats eat for Dinner? Cat Food.

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A prostitute has sex with a man. She gave him herpes.

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404 Error: Joke not found

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Dan O'Driscoll

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What did the fat man get for his birthday? diabetes

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Hello I'm a fat kid

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A man walks into the bar, goes up to the bar tender and says "exuse me, please could I have a pint of bitter" the bartender says "sure"

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You might be a redneck if you are a an uneducated white farm laborer from the south.

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What did the plane say after it flew into the World Trade Center on 9/11 Nothing, planes are incapable of speaking.

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a. get me a drink b. a would but but i got no arms

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a guy is driving home his wife calls him and she say's be careful there is a lunatic driving on the wrong side of the road towards traffic he then reply saying they all are

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What's funnier than a dead baby? We'll.. Pretty much everything I can think of.

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Q: How many Jew does it take to change a light bulb? Here is the answer: A: A lightbulb cannot be changed, it either is or isn't. Do you mean replace a burned-out bulb with a new one? Here, in this case, with design, logistics, manufacturing, marketing of just that single bulb- there are many people involved. It could be argued that we all play some small part in the process. ------ Nothing to see here, end of the joke. :)

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A black man, hispanic man, and white man walk in to a bar. They are all friends. They enjoy a few beers together then call a taxi to take them home because it is irresponsible to operate a motor vehicle while under the influence of alcohol or other drugs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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