I am just trying to grasp the terms you use Nero, you are a genius, I mean I always heard about it, but honestly, well, my first impression of you here was... Different.

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Is that a threat or a promise? dragonflies

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What's (333x4)-198+(456x100,432)-10+5? Bet ya said i don't know! I don't either.

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Q: What can a bench do that a mexican can't? A: Support a family.

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What did the Scorpio say to the Aquarius? "How's Uranus? Ohhhhh!" The Aquarius replied: "I have maggots."

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wheres a good place to find funny jokes? anti-joke.com

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what are three words that are never used together in the same sentence ...... salid taste good

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What do you call cheese thats not yours? Somebody elses cheese

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if it takes skill to trip over a flat surface, i have no skill...

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, and says nothing. Ducks are incapable of speech and therefore it would be physically impossible for a duck to say anything. Where the duck walks up to does not partake in the matter.

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Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

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Knock Knock Whos there? The IRS *locking noise*

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Whats black and white, black and white, black and white, black and white, black and white? A Nun falling down stairs

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Q: what do polo bears have for lunch A: iceburger

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What was the hardest part about the orphanage burning down? My cock.

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Your momma is so fat that the late, great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook her breasts for clocks

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have schizophrenia, and don't have any friends

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He removes the piece of lingerie from his face and continues shopping for clothes.

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A man is walking alone in a park and stumbles upon a lamp. He rubs the lamp and a genie appears out of thin air. The genie tells him he has three wishes to wish for whatever his heart desires. The man naturally wishes for Anthony Davis to shave his damn unibrow. He then throws the lamp at a little boys face and laughs uncontrollably.

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Are you a homophobe? No, I'm cake. ,.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead.

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b

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A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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