How do you kill a down-syndrome kid? fire.

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Knock Knock There's no door here, I'm right in front of you.

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A piece of rope walks into a bar, and asks for a beer. The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve ropes here." The rope goes into the bathroom, ties himself into a knot, then rubs himself against the walls until his ends are ragged. Then he walks out and says to the bartender: "I'm a frayed knot." The bartender replies, "Right, I see that you've tied yourself into a knot and frayed your ends. So what? What are you trying to prove?" "Well, I...I mean, it was supposed to be a pun, and you were supposed to react like...like it was..." "Look, I thought I was doing you something nice by letting you use the restroom, even though I told you we don't serve ropes here. And then you go in there and rub yourself against the walls or some crazy shit, and probably get them all dirty, and you come out and expect I'm going to give you a drink because of a pun? Is that how you think this works? Get out of my bar before I call the police." The rope slinks out, still tied in a knot, and eventually finds somebody willing to buy a bottle of cheap vodka for him at a liquor store. He never sets foot in the bar again.

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Q: How do find the population of Mexico? A: You Google it.

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Why was the panda sad? It's family died when China had an earthquake.

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Whats worse than The Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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*Knock-Knock* "Who's there?" "The police, you're under arrest for the murder of your wife and your two children."

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OH NO, ZOMBIES!!!!!!!!!!

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Knock knock. Who's there? *gun shot*

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how much dub would a dubstep step if a dubstep could step dub? purple

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Yo mama so fat she died

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What's worse than listening to a teacher talk? This joke.

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why did the chicken cross the road.

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How do you get a baby out of a blender? Call the police and have them deal with the tragedy.

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whats more serious than rape... the holocaust

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Why did the 40 year old man quickly close his web page when his wife called his name? Because he had to leave.

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KEVIN HART

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why did the koala fall out of the tree it was dead why did the 2nd koala fall out of the tree it was hit by the first koala why did the 3rd koala fall out of the tree it thought it was a game why did the 4th koala fall out of the tree it was fit by a fridge why did the 5th koala fall out of the tree it was inside the fridge why did the 6th koala fall out of the tree it was punished for dropping a fridge why did the 7th koala fall out of the tree it committed suicide after framing the 6th koala

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Two guys walk into a bar. You think the second one would've noticed and avoided it.

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yo mama's so ugly, it affects her self esteem.

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A teenage boy tells his family that he is gay. His mother says she had always known, and they accept him for who he is.

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guess what? chicken butt.

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What's big and black? A black fridge.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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