Women

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Q: What can a bench do that a mexican can't? A: Support a family.

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I do not like the fact that you are linked with the feds.

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yo mama so fat she's fat

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Wats wet and salty and people on the west coast get covered in it? Sweat.

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what did the 0 say to the 8 nice belt

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What do you call a woman who is good at driving? Danica Patrick

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what did the man with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? cancer.

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Baseball

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Q: Why was the man hit by the train? A: He was tied to the rail road tracks...

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what's the difference between a babie and a watermelon. one's fun to hit with a hammer. . . ht other ones a watermelon.

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Whoa! A talking carrot!

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A woman goes to the hospital to receive an ultra-sound after taking a pregnancy test a few weeks before. The doctor comes out and says "Congratulations Susanne would you like to know the results? Susanne says "No thank you." Then, the doctor says "Good, because its actually a retarded baby that we found."

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What happended to the family in the hurricane? They died stupid

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Your Momma's so fat when the whales see her they don't say anything as they are unable to speak the human language.

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Why did little Timmy get absolutely nothing for Christmas? He is Jewish.

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That awkward when you adimaticlly read "moment in your head because you have seen too many of these awkward moment jokes.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, Tulips are red, And my garden is red. OMG...MY GARDEN IS ON FIRE

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Three soldiers, one Japanese, one American, and one Italian were stuck in a desert. How did they escape? A rescue squad of thirty trained troops came down in a helicopter and brought them each to their respective homes except the Italian who was actually a Mafia boss so they put him in prison.

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A blond is stranded on a desert island when she finds a magic lamp. Except it's actually a rock and she is hallucinating due to dehydration and starvation.

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How do you stop a black man from drowning? Bring him to shore and, if you are certified, perform cpr.

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What do a bunch of dead babies look like in a blender? I don't know I was too busy masturbating.

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Why did the kids stop playing tag? Because the boy was "it" was kidnapped and never seen again

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In Capitalist America, bank robs you!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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