If 25 cows walk in to the grocery store, what do you have? A scared manager. MOO!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

When does 1=17? How many schizophrenics does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Do you want to come with me? NO! oh i wanted to cum on your face. Thats god damn gay Nope thats god damn sexy.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did one wall say to the other? Nothing, walls don't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Once upon a time there was a prince and a princess. They married as was the social custom of the time, and produced a series of children whose purpose was to sustain the royal bloodline for many years to come. AF

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Violets are red Roses are blue I scrrewed that up Now can i screw you?

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What word starts with 'f' and ends in 'uck'? Firetruck

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Lindsay Lohan is often caught flashing her vagina...

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you call a woman not in the kitchen? Her name.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Knock knock. Who's there? We are members of the church of Jesus Christ of latter day saints.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do cats eat for Dinner? Cat Food.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How many doctors does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One, usually.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Who is Soulja Boy's best friend? YOUUUUUUUUUUUU

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Q-What's the difference between me and Chuck Norris? A1- Nothing. We are both humans. A2- Technically, his atomic structure, genes, heritage, blood type, hair color, skin color, muscle tone, eye color, and countless other things. What's more, I am not an actor who revels in fake glory.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's the capital of Thailand? The letter 'T'...

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Roses are red Violets are blue Get in the car or i'll shoot you

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What band protects hope in current music? Nickelback.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What's the best thing about sex with 24 year olds? They're in their sexual prime.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Nero, what if you are using me now? Manipulating me? You think I enjoy falling in love after chatting with you in a site which is not even meant for chatting? You can do that, you are a "facilitator", I don't care as much for point zero, as I do care about you, hell, if things where different, id quit the whole thing to stay with you! I could say I will never forgive you if you make me feel safe by your side, accept your help only to get stabbed in the back for trusting you.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

"I lost the game." Hahahahahahahahahahahaha in your face

thumb_up thumb_down -27

A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

69

thumb_up thumb_down -37

-Whats the worst part about being a black jew? -You have to sit in the back of the oven.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

There was an old woman who lived in a shoe. She had so many children her uterus fell out.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops