Why is Eeyore in Winnie the Pooh always sad? Cause he has a nail in his anus

An armed ninja walks into a bank. He is apprehended by the police, whom he tries to attack with a drawn sword, and is promptly shot down in a hail of gunfire causing civilian injuries and rather significant property damage.

How many apples fit in a garbage bag? I actually don't know. I was asking you.

What do you call a young fortune teller who just escaped from jail? A small medium at large.

How did the dog die? It was wet because of the rain so the little boy put him in the microwave for 30 minutes to warm him up

What's the best thing about sex with 24 year olds? They're in their sexual prime.

What's funnier than 24? 25.

when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? cause there are more geese on one side

An Irishman walks into a bar and orders a Coke.

What does a mexican do when he gets lost in the woods? He does his best to find food, shelter, and water until a search and rescue operation finds him.

A man walks into the bar, goes up to the bar tender and says "exuse me, please could I have a pint of bitter" the bartender says "sure"

There was 3 women, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. I don't know the rest of the story but the ending was when they guy came all over their faces.

jacobs 1inch gets matt. t in 4 seconds

whats red white and blue? i dont know

Three jewish men are standing in at a bar. Its getting late and the bartender tells the three men its time to go home. As they walk out to the street, the bartender asks if they will be needing a ride home. Of course these three men had a few drinks, but did not live too far down the road, so they decided to walk. They pass the first mans house and he goes in to see his wife and three kids. They walk past the second mans house and he goes in to see his fiance leaving only one man left. He gets to his house, unlocks the door and goes inside only to find a note on the counter. He gets onto his computor and see that he forgot his wallet at the bar. He goes downstairs and walks out the door only to find himself falling into a giant pit. After falling for a while he starts thinking about his life. Then he remebered that he wasnt jewish.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause your mom has cancer

wanna hear a joke yo mamma just died

Knock Knock. Who's there? I have a door you don't have to say, knock knock.

Q. Why did the koala bear go to court? A. Because too many people were referring to it as a bear when it is infact not a bear.

Roses are white Violets are white I did it in the garden

What did Mambo say to Jumbo? Nothing. Because they weren't friends.

LOL i just pissed on Hitlers grave! Shoudn't killed the Jews BITCH!

An underaged man walks into a bar. He orders a beer, but the bartender says we don't serve minors. The boy then rushes out if the bar for fear of being caught.

What's funnier than a dead baby? We'll.. Pretty much everything I can think of.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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