Why did the fly get off the toilet? It got pissed off.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What smells, tastes, and looks like trash? Garbage.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

I got a joke. What did the Platypus say to the Policeman?" "What a ridiculous question, Platypus's can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Knock Knock. Shut up.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

your mamas so old, her social security number is 1!

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What is worse then Hitler? Shelly's Cooking.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Your mama's so fat, that during her last physical checkup, her attending physician informed her that it would be in her best interest to lose some weight before any serious medical conditions arose that would adversely affect her health and well being in a chronic fashion.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

9:11 make a wish

thumb_up thumb_down +23

I jizzed in my pants. It tasted good

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did the used car salesman stop selling cars? He got fired.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

How do you wake Lady Gaga up? Poker face

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

lewis bedford

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did the kids stop playing tag? Because the boy was "it" was kidnapped and never seen again

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why is brennan goldade such a loser? Cause he likes men

thumb_up thumb_down +21

roses are red, violets are not, this poem makes no sense. Bananas

thumb_up thumb_down +21

yo mama's so ugly, it affects her self esteem.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Q: what do strawberry and a cat have in common? A: they are both red except for the cat

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A businessman walks out of a store with his new haircut he was bald.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

do you know a really good joke? i don't have one.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What is the difference between a bench and a black man? It is socially acceptable to sit on a bench to eat your lunch. If you did so to a black man you would probably be arrested.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

whats better than shoes feet

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What has ears, but can't hear, eyes, but can't see, a mouth, but can't talk, and legs, but can't walk? A deaf and blind paraplegic with an improperly functioning larynx.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops