Q: what do you call a guy with a stolen cat in his pocket A: The police because stealing animals is illegal

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Kim Kardashian's Marriage.

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Knock knock *No one was home*

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What did the blonde do when she found out one is most likely to get in a car accident within 6 miles of the home? She drove more carefully in her neighborhood.

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Windows Vista

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Why couldn't the mexican feed his family? Because a large percent of mexican immigrants in the United States do not have jobs due to dicrimination against illegal immigrants crossing the soutern border, thus rendering them more vunerable to unemployment is that is vastly present in the United States.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Some poems don't rhyme, This one doesn't.

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Three men walked into a metal pole

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a little boy and a pedophile are walking in the woods. it is late at night and therefore very dark. the little boy turns to the pedophile.and says "gee mister, it sure is scary out here." the pedophile responds "yeah, and your'e going to get raped"

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A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I will ask you one question, and that will determine whether you can enter Heaven." The man nods nervously. St. Peter asks, "Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" The man thinks long and hard. "No, I always made sure to apologize." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You have passed the test, and may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

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Why can't Billy ride the bicycle? Billy's a fish.

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How do Chinese people name their kids? The couple discuss possible names and then pick the one that they feel suits the child best.

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Disregard Females, Acquire Currency.

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why did the kid go in his room and lock the door. to masturbate

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What if Chuck Norris got shot by a bullet? The most interesting man in the world would save him.

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A priest, a rabbi and a shaman walk into a bar. Except there is no rabbi and there is no shaman and the bar is actually my 8th birthday party priest is molesting me. And the priest is my dad. My dad molested me. A lot...

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I like vagina, hahahahah!!!!!!!!!!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? 9/11

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What do you call "Bob the Builder" when he retires Bob

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what do you call a dear with no I? No I dear

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the real mccoy

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What do you call a teacher that gets wasted? A wasted teacher.

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Women's rights.

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Your mom is so dumb that she doesn't get this joke

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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