What do you call 3 horses in 1 boat, in the middle of the Dead Sea? Lost

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why was the kid named owen? Because thats what his parents wnted him to be named

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? I don't fucking know.

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yo momma is so stupid she went to the beach and the whales song " dooooooonnn't stop. belieeeeving. wwwwwhoooooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOA"

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Why was Brother Jim so loyal to god? Because he had a harpoon through his anal cavity.

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What if Chuck Norris got shot by a bullet? The most interesting man in the world would save him.

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A priest, a rabbi and a shaman walk into a bar. Except there is no rabbi and there is no shaman and the bar is actually my 8th birthday party priest is molesting me. And the priest is my dad. My dad molested me. A lot...

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"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Orange!" "Oranges can't speak, who is this really?" "Your neighbor Jake, can I borrow your lawn mower?" "Sure, let me go to the garage and get it for you."

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I like vagina, hahahahah!!!!!!!!!!

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A lady in a bank was asked by the clerk to round the sum she wanted to raise from her account. She rounded it several times, but the clerk continued to insist that the sum needs to be rounded. She left the bank confused, with a coupon consisting of completely rounded sum of 691, 88$. Next day she returned with a coupon with a rounded sum of 690,88$. The clerk asked again the lady to round the sum. The lady started helplessly to cry and said she had rounded is already with a harp, and couldn't make it round anymore, she even removed the sharp 1 from the sum.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? A Jehovah Witness.

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What did the rapist say when he spotted the young girl? I am going to rape you!

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Liars go to hell! -God

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Whats the difference between a black guy and a retard? NOTHING!!!!!!

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Q: How do you get a jewish girls number? A: You roll up her sleeve

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A blond, a brunette and a redhead are all trapped on a desert island. They work together and manage to survive until help arrives.

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Why was the blonde woman crying? -because she witnessed her infant get sucked into a jet engine and was very sad.

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What do nine out of ten people enjoy? Gang rape.

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How do you make a Fireman cry? You kill his family in a fire.

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Lets go Detroit Pistons!

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Q: What's annoying and doesn't smoke? A: AIDS

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A man is walking on a beach when he finds a golden lamp. He rubs it and a genie comes out. The genie tells the man he will grant three wishes. The man wastes his wishes on material goods that do not bring him happiness.

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The geese of Growmore

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Q: What's more gross than uncooked hamburgers? A: Afterbirth.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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