Q: why is the squirrel stuck in the tree? A: because he should have finished high school.

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What did my mom say when she walked in my room? You smell like body oder.

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A guy walks into a bar. The bartender says "what can I get you?" The man replies "what do you recommend?" The bartender says "get a beer." The man says "okay."

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Yeah, you cant make nukes without certain components which are illegal to come by, you know Iranian Uranium I believe, I still feel pretty ill, if you dont mind, lets change the subject. Say, does the word yellowcake mean anything to you?

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So these two guys are in this barn f!@#$%^ this owl! no terms of service were available but i posted anyway cuz i just didnt want the best anti to be missed!

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Knock Knock Who's there? I'm from the Department of Child Services, i'm here to take your children.

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A man in a restaurant says "Waiter! What's this fly doing in my soup?" The waiter apologizes and offers to comp the meal.

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What is black, white and hungry? A woman with a rare skin disorder known as Vitiligo which causes discolourtion of the skins pigment in patches; who is hungry.

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how did the girl fall off the swing. BECAUSE SHE HAD NO ARMS HAHAHAH

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You would too if your name was mmfmffemuuuuuffuummuuuuuluuu.

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I would write a joke, but it wouldn't be funny

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What's the worst thing to find in an empty box? Nothing,It's empty

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what do u get when you cross a kangaroo and an elephant a genetically disformed animal comes out who dies shortly after

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How many militant feminist does it take to change a lightbulb? 2, one to change the bulb and another to suck my dick.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Nothing, the holocaust was a tragic event in human history.

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Why did the man fall off the cliff? I don't know, I have mental AIDS.

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Three men walk into a bar because they were all blind.

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An Israeli, a Palestinian and an American walk into a bar. The Israeli shoots the Palestinian and says it was self defence. The American agrees with him.

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There was a golfer at the field where people usually golf. he had a golf club. so did the man next to him. The man i spoke of first hit the guy that was next to him with a golf club. Why? because he was angry at the man for shoving socks down his daughters throat and extracted her eyes with a melon scooper. This should not be humorous, the girl got blood and eye juice on her fathers new shoes when she came home.

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What's the best part of having sex with twenty-eight year olds? There's twenty of them.

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say it aloud and fast: •im sofa king stew ped •ice bank mice elf •alpha Q •mike hunt •mike ock

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Why couldn't Jimmy ride a bike Because Jimmy was a fish

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Dinosaur!

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Whats better than winning a gold in the special olympics? Not being a retard

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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