Roses are brown Violets are brown everything is brown Who shat in my garden?

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What did the boy get from Penn State University? A College Degree

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Q: Why did the girl fall of her swing? A: She was hit by a rogue fridge. Q: Why didn't she get back up? A: She was quite badly injured.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream cone? He was hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What blue and red? poop in a saggy bag

thumb_up thumb_down +18

jess yawns with no hands in front of her mouth. true story.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Hypothetical questions are a waste of time and you are not achieving your full potential by reading this during work.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q: How many dead people does it take to change a light bulb? A: Trick question...i have sex with them in the dark

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What did the American call the Arab? Nothing the American could not talk because he suffered from throat cancer because of the effects of 9/11 and thus causing his hatred towards Arabs and led to the Arabs death. Green

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did the mole say? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +16

If I have $5 and Chuck Norris has $5, we both have the same monetary value.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why don't they sell pharmaceuticals in the rain forest? Because it is too sparsely populated and not economically viable.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

WHAT DO YOU CALL MEXICANS IN A HOT TUBE BOILED BEANS (; NO RACIAL

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Brienna Chladek (515)556-4811. Call me;) anytime I'm a teenager:) xoxo

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A horse walks into a bar. He ordered some fries.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why do people often give Jimmy strange looks? Because Jimmy has Down Syndrome

thumb_up thumb_down +16

An Englishman, Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a pub where they are presented with a situation, the Englishman and Scotsman react appropriately but the Irishman does something foolish.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Rick Perry.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

why did the chicken cross the road. why? because he felt like it

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A man and his son are in a store, the man says to his son, "That candy bar has your name on it." The son replies, "I wish that you didn't name me Butterfingers." The dad answers, "I wish that you were never born."

thumb_up thumb_down +10

You better run like your ass is under fire, because it will be if you don't.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the guy read anti jokes? because there funny

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops