Q:what do you get when you get when you cross a dog and a human A: a human-dog hybrid with AIDS

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whats worse than getting lost in europe? becoming the middle in the human centipede.

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What is the worst joke ever? This one.

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Think of a number 1-10 Now add 39 Divide that by 20 Subtract two Now close your eyes.. Dark isn't it?

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Q: Why did Sally keep falling off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Why can't Chuck Norris divide by zero? Because it is impossible, the answer is undefined.

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'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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What do you call a black man on the moon?? Never going to happen

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Whats more dangerous then a man with a gun? two men with guns.

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jack be nimble jack be quick jack is a parapeligic.....there's no need for more

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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What's worse than dropping your loli-pop? The Holocaust

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What do you call a Welshman with a stick up his arse? A very odd man

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What's better than rape? Consensual sex.

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What did one tree say to the other tree? Nothing, trees can't talk.

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry man passes, takes a look at the muffins lifts his shoulders and walks away. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin was poisoned.

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Knock Knock. Erm, sorry to be weird, but can you perhaps use the doorbell, because it's new and has a novelty chime. I'm proud of it and get a little chuckle everytime it rings in the vain hope that, perhaps you, the visitor, may also find it entertaining. Who's there anyway?'

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quiz is to quizzicle as test is to test___.

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How do you make a dentist cry? Kill all his family.

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Jesus Christ

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why did the teacher quit her job and become a musician? Because her class was very mean to her and growing up she had always wanted to play music

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Q: What did the nazi say to hitler? A: You like my Auschwitz?

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have alzheimers. Cheese on toast.

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whats older than your mom? a tortoise that has been living more than a couple hundred years

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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