What is that smell? I don't know. I'm color blind.

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Why didn't the boy want to go to school? Because it was 3am.

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The police shouldn't have cars. They should use skateboards and use flowers as their gun. When they catch a criminal in the act, they have to hug him before sending him to prison

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Whats long, green and falls out of trees? A canoe. Why did the old man fall out of the tree? He was in the canoe.

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whats red, sits in a corner and is slowly getting smaller and smaller baby with a cheese grater whats green and sits motionless in the corner same baby 2 weeks later

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Why was the black person sent to the back of the bus? All of the front and middle seats were taken.

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why was the kid laying in the middle of the baseball field? he was shot in the face then mauled by a bear.

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Why doesn't a ducks quack echo? Actually, it does, but the echo is imperceptible to human ears.

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Is it considered sexual harassment if a midget says to a woman, "your hair smells nice"? Holy crap i don't like black people.

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What do you call a man who never farts in public? A private tooter!

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Cleveland sports, lebron james' ever receding hairline

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A boy asks his teacher for a eraser....he was given a blue pen. Turns out he was in space.

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Roses are red Violets are violet the last time i saw this poem i couldn't rhyme no more

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Why did the girl go to Jupiter? To get more stupider

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Why did man lay down? His dog ate his genitals.

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There is two guys named tard and retard on a boat in shallow water. they both fall off. Who gets back up onto the boat? - Obviously Tard because ur dealing with a retard here.

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A man walks into the bar. It was typical day and nothing interesting happened.

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What's better than finding Jesus in your room? Finding Chuck Norris in your bed.

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What's worse then a missed call from your dad? A missed call from your mom.

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Why do we have brown eggs? Because black people have sex with chickens

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Why did the chicken cross the road. grass was greener on the other side!

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What do you find at a black guys yard sale? A bunch of reasonably priced items since he comes from a low income household.

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Watching your mum get sandwiched by two black guys...

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It works on whoever I have an emotional attachment with, for example people might be thinking you and I write in the exact same style, but I am actually copying your way of typing (spelling, word composition etc) this because we relate on a deep emotional level with people that like "get us" because they can act and behave like us. This again doubles the effect of the hypnosis, since when I get "super high on trance" and you feel that way, well, we both reach into the same wavelength, literally. Scientists and hypnotists supposedly have no idea as to why this happens, but I know, it is because our brain patterns are so similar, that even though we are at a long distance, your body believes itself to be an extension of mine and the other way around. How do I know this? Yogurt.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops