Two Mexicans were sitting in the back of a car. They were carpooling to save gas.

Excuse me. Oh, would you mind hitting the 15th floor button for me? Thanks.

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Q:How do you sleep with Paris Hilton? A:You don't. she got herpes.

A deer looks at the ground and sees something strange. He wonders what it could be. A rabbit comes along and thinks the same. A badger promptly arrives after the rabbit and thinks the exact same. 4 seconds later they all get hit by a train.

Q:What did the turtle say to the jaguar? A: Well, a turtle and a jaguar live in totally different habitats, turtles live in water while jaguars live in grasslands, so it would be unlikely for them to cross paths and communicate. Turtles and jaguars are unable to speak and, if a jaguar were to talk to a turtle, the turtle would be unable to make out words because turtles can only pick up vibrations. And, they would have nothing to talk about.

It may be Stupid but its also Dumb. ~Patrick Star

Why did the white man buy a new pair of socks? His old ones has holes.

What did Santa Claus get for Christmas? Santa isn't real.

What's hot and cold at the same time? Hotcold.

Why did the christmas tree smell like shit? because pavaroti used it as a dildo

why did your mum die young because she had canser

three peanuts where walking down a dark alley, one was asalted

I have cancer. And you're next.

Q: What do you say to a person in a wheelchair who fall downs the stairs? A: Nothing because most likely they would take an elevator.

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a dead baby? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

The dog, Marley from Marley and Me. It died.

why did the kitten drink its milk? because it doesnt have a motor so has no need for petrol.

Knock knock. Who's there? We are members of the church of Jesus Christ of latter day saints.

What do you call a black person who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Living in Africa.

Why did the dinosaur cross the road? It didn't.

How do you knock up a Catholic girl? Put your penis into her vagina without wearing a condom.

a white man, an asian man, and a mexican man are on a plane and they realize how inefficient the airline was in filling the flight, seeing as there were only three men on board.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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