roses are red violets are blue i need a pee and so do u

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

Why did the young boy hit the other young boy? Because the other young boy was bullying his friend and he thought it was time he should stand up for himself and take control of the situation.

Today we eat large amounts of pizza. The one piece had a lot of mushrooms. Like more than the other pieces. The cheese was flawless except for the burnt edges.

what do a blonde and a brunette have in common? They were both red-heads until they walked into great clips.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Probably because it saw some food, or because it felt threatened on the side of the road it was already on.

What kind of Juice do White supremacists Hate the most? Minute Maid.

Excuse me sir, do you know where I can find the restroom? I don't know, I'm sorry.

Want to hear the World's shortest joke? Peace. [L]

What happends when two gay guys want to have kids? They can't, so they go to an orphanage and adopt one.

A little boy walks into a bar its fine, he's over 21, he just looks younger.

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After being told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, he walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

what did nena say in the library while her and her friends were on anti-jokes? I don't know. I wasn't there.

What did the man on the moon say? ...Im on the moon.

Why did the chicken cross the playground? Because he was looking for other chickens because he has no friends and he got bullied when he was in 12th grade. He got picked on because he was sledding down his hill in his backyard and he accidentally scraped one side of his face on ice and started bleeding. The next day his classmates started calling him two face.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. I cut off his leg.

What is more difficult than trying to get blood from a stone? Trying to teach it Japanese in the process. [L]

Why Was the student driver using his cell phone in the car? Because he had gotten in a mild accident with a midsized sedan so he was quickly dialing his AAA agent for roadside assistance so he can get back to his loving family and three children

Wanna hear a clean joke? A little boy took a bath with Bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is the name of the man.

My Penis is so big. How big is it? If you lay my penis down beside another similarly lengthy object, approximately 10" long, it would most likely surpass the length of the object you chose to measure it to.

What about the cool kids down the block. Their friend just died with a serious health condition.

How many Santa Clauses does it take to change a light bulb? Santa Claus isn't real.

Im not random you just can't think as fa-bunnies

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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