how do you wake up a really old man? you dont, he's probably already dead.

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what did the blind, deaf, paraplegic child get for christmas? other than cancer, nothing.

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What did the orphan get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Weaner

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One early Christmas morning i went downstairs. My mother told me that she had gotten me the ultimate stocking stuffer. It was a foot

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My dog barks when someones at the door.

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What's worse than seeing Helen Keller behind the wheel of a car? Being run over by Helen Keller.

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what is the difference between hitler and the jews? They had different religions

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What do you call a smelly black person? An African american with poor hygiene

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Why couldn't the blond dial 911? She lost her arms in a tragic car accident last year

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What's the difference between a goat and a cherry? You can't put a goat on top of your ice cream.

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someone called someone else a frog

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Q: What do you call a vacuum that doesn't suck stuff up? A: A broken vacuum.

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"How high are you?" "I don't know, sir." "Well, look at the god damn altimeter."

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What is the worst part about eating a vegetable? Eating the wheelchair too.

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what's red and has seven feet? the red man who had seven feet as a result of a serious genetic mutation

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No, I had no idea, nor did I know that Nero means Black or Darkness until I searched it up some weeks ago. No, I would never photoshop anything, I mean sure I am the girl/woman thing with the big tits, but that`s like all I got going... Oh and yeah I use glasses sometimes because these contact lenses become itchy after a while and stuff.

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Paper or plastic? Yes...

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Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

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A man is eating in a restaurant and says, "Waiter! There's a fly in my soup!" The waiter says, "I'm sorry, can I bring you some salad instead?"

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Why was Osama Bin Laden so hard to find? His hiding place was difficult to come across.

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Whats worse than finding a repeated joke on anti joke? The holocaust Whats worse than finding a repeated joke on anti joke? The holocaust

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? "We are both lawyers."

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Why do aliens listen to relaxing music while they have sex? They like to cum in peace. \m/

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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