whats big and green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? a snooker table

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wanna hear a cat joke? just kitten

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A:You wanna here a good anti joke B:Yeah/sure A:Me too

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why did suzie fall of the swings? because she had no arms.

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Why do dinosaurs have no friends? Because they are all dead

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Why did the dish run away from the spoon? None of them ran neither one has legs

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Why did the police arrest the black man? He'd committed a crime, and was punished accordingly.

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Modern math questions: If I have 9 apples and you have 12 ice cubes, his many pancakes fit on a roof? Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

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And you honored it I see :P

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When you aren't feeling well, you should see a doctor like this: https://encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcS5u4lryU5PzmLUKCGEKZgDWMeQ_96VLEKFGu7Wvk-4M7UXHkOXBw

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And now a word from our sponsors

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I'm a blonde... rejected from Kaplan.

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "Yeah, but you make a really great sandwich!"

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The awkward moment when you are reading these jokes and either it's not funny or you don't get it...

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a rabbi and a priest walk into a wall

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A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released in a nearby park in a safe and risk free process.

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What happened to your face It got hit by a bus By cheyenne

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Why was the black man hanging from the tree? He fell and had to grab a branch.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, The first line is spelled wrong, Ha, I tricked you

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*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and act like it's original because I changed one word*

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Are you ready kids "Aye Aye Captain" I Can't hear you "AYE AYE CAPTAIN" Ohh... Who lives in a pineapple under the sea "Spongebob squarepants" Absorbant and yellow and porous is he "Spongebob Squarepants" If nautical nonsense be something you wish "Spongebob Squarepants" Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish "Spongebob Squarepants" READY Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!

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You can pick your nose, and you can pick your friends nose. But you can't rob a bank. That's a felony.

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Wanna hear a joke? It's here somewhere You looked :D There ain't jokes on Antijoke.com

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(Knock, knock) A: Who's there? B: Orange A: That is impossible. Oranges are inanimate objects and, therefore, cannot speak.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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